Brothers are from the devil

 The only times we see Butterfly & Rhonda are when we're at our parents for birthdays or holidays. We don't ever get a chance to really 'talk' to them though.  One of these days I'm gonna video what happens at my parents house when we're all together.  Mine & Rhonda's birthdays are coming up next.  It's just something you have to see - it can't be explained...

Usually I try to talk to Rhonda & B-rad talks to Butterfly & my parents interrupt incessantly.  I wanted to be able to sit down & have an actual conversation with them & a few(!) weeks ago, we were able to met up w/ them to have dinner on the river. 

We had discussed our aging parents & how they tend to have a lot of 'stuff' laying around the house.  The house is VERY old (over 100 years), it has one bathroom (OH THE HUMANITY.  We grew up in that house!) & the bedrooms upstairs (where Jer & I 'lived') were built into the attic so it's not like it's going to be a real 'gem' for anyone to want to buy when they're gone.  So Butterfly suggested that 'when they're gone- we should just light a match to it & let it go.'  Which I was fine with.  (Don't judge...)

Like I said, it was a few weeks ago & last Friday my parents were DELIGHTED to tell me "Jer is coming home this weekend!"  (He lives in Louisville with Rhonda & tries to make it his lifes mission to not doesn't come 'home' very often.)  Of course, this irritated me (because they see me everyday, but WHO CARES?) & I made some flippant comment (or exact quote), "Oh goody!  The prodigal son is coming home!"  And then I might have clapped my hands.

Maybe.

When I got there today for lunch, she asked me about a couple of things in the house, 

Mom: "Jaime - what will you do w/ that cabinet behind you when I die?"   (It's a china cabinet thing her dad built.)

Me: "Uhm, well, uh - I don't really have anyplace for it.  I would probably ask some of the family if they wanted it.  If they didn't I'd put it in storage someplace."

Mom:  (taking wooden eggs she very detailed HAND PAINTED out of a decorative basket on the table) "What about these eggs?  Do you want one of these eggs I painted? "

Jaime:  "UHM, noooooo."

{In true 'my brother is a punk & I should have had my head examined for wanting to have dinner with him' - he told our mother we were going to BURN DOWN HER HOUSE.  Bastard...}

Mom: "WELLLLL - Jeremy was here this weekend  & he told me that you two sat down & talked about it & you've decided that when we die you're going to strike a match & let the place burn."

Jaime: "Oh, yea - we did say that..."

And then I sent him a text... & if you think he was apologetic or had remorse... you would be wrong.  (of course, I meant 'when she dies' not does.)  

And see- this is how he does me.  He drops the bomb & I'm left to deal with the nuclear fall-out while he's way the hell over in Louisville.

Obviously he is the smarter sibling... :)