Hawaii - the series: I hate the beach. There. I said it...

Ok, stalkers.  It's finally the moment you've all been waiting for... our trip to Hawaii.... 

 I have decided to do my posts not by what we did each day, but by the activity itself.   First, I will tell you all about the beaches we visited.  How beautiful they were.  How blue the water was.  Bleh. 

We left uber early on Saturday.  And by uber early I mean we were on a plane leaving for Houston at 6:15 AM.

 We got to Houston & had a 2 hour layover.  We were going to be on a big ole plane for the 8 hour (yes, 8.freaking.hours...) flight to Honolulu.  This must be a flight that leaves from Houston a lot because they had these plastic flowers on the counter.

 

 Like I said, we were on a big ole plane.  I've never been on a big ole plane.  Most the flights I've been on are the 2 seats, aisle, then 3 seats.  This one was 2 seats, aisle, 3 seats, aisle, 2 more seats.  Butterfly did what I would expect him to do... act silly...

 We were super excited to be on our way.  This was before the 8 hour flight.  Who's NOT excited then?  By about hour 4, I was ready to jump off that plane.. And realized I was going to have to do it all over again in a week.  Greaaaat....

 YAY!  Official Hawaiian stuff!!!!

 Now-let me clarify something for you.  You know how in the movies when the people land at the airport they are greeted by lovely Hawaiian ladies dressed in traditional Hawaiian garb & then they smile & say, "Aloha" in their angelic voices & give you lei's?  That's.all.crap.  

There ARE people at the airport handing out lei's.  They are NOT lovely Hawaiian ladies.  They are NOT dressed in traditional Hawaiian garb.  They are NOT smiling & saying 'Aloha' in angelic voices.  They are there with some kind of 'tour' & have ratty cardboard signs with names written on it.  If you've not booked a tour or something - no lei for you.  Sigh...   

 Once we left the Honolulu airport, we took a shuttle to our hotel in Waikiki.  We landed around 1 pm Hawaii time.  Let me break it down for you, stalkers - that's 7 pm our time.  Hawaii is 6 hours behind us.  The time difference is a real bitch.

Our first goal was to find somewhere to eat.  We were starving.  Even the skinny tri-athletes!  Another myth?  Free food on the airline. They have food, but it costs quite a bit of moo-lah.  Soooo, on the 8 hour flight, we ate from the arsenal of snacks we packed.  Have I said we were starving?

Everything was in walking distance & we saw all kinds of things on our walk to food.  Surfboards are everywhere.  

 UHM, mom said, "That girl looks like she's wearing her underwear!!!"  So I took a pic...funny thing is B-rad & I both had cameras as we walked.  When I downloaded the pictures...we both had one of this girl & her underwear.  Nice...

 We chose to eat at Cheesburgers in Paradise.  It was yummy, greasy, All-American food. We hadn't had a real meal since breakfast in Houston around 8:30 am our time.  I took a pic of this license plate next to our table because it's from 1976...the year I was born.

 This chick had some crazy hair.  I beg you to make it bigger.  There are no words needed...I think she meant it to look this way...

 After we ate, everyone (but me) wanted to go to the beach.  In Hawaii, the beach is never too far away.  Now-I said I don't like the beach.  And I don't.  These pics are for ya'll...

Rhonda, Butterfly & B-rad were playing in the water & mom & I were bored so we decided to walk around a bit.

We saw these guys playing chess.  I have seen stuff like this on tv...

 We also stopped & I bought a flower for my hair... purple, of course.  (Please don't forget I have been awake since 4 am & travelling for 12 hours.  Wow...)  All the chicks were wearing them.  I wanted everyone to know I was a tourist.  

 We stayed in Waikiki for one night & on Sunday we took another flight to the Big Island where we stayed the rest of the time.  What's the first thing we did when we got to our resort & settled in?  

Oh wow, you guessed it... we hit the beach.  Bleh.   

 Here's the deal:  I don't really like the water.  I don't like being wet.  I don't like the sand in & on everything.  I don't think the sounds of the waves crashing is relaxing - I find it boring.  You can imagine the look on my face every time someone said, "hey-let's go to the beach..."  

The first beach we went to on the Big Island was really rocky (uhm, don't forget-Hawaii is a grown up volcano...).  The sand was basically crushed up rocks.  Super hard on your feet & hell on your pedicure...

Ok, yea, this is pretty.  But really...for hours?!  C'mon...

I was able to get B-rad outta the water for a second to take a pic with me.

 I will admit, this was cool.  The waves came in so big & then they crashed on the shore & shot in the air.  Cool the first couple of times.  Not so cool after the 9,342nd time...  

 Snorkeling is a big thing in Hawaii.  Since we checked into our resort & had to run immediately to the beach, no one had any snorkeling 'stuff', they were just looking with goggles. 

 Can't you tell by their faces they are up to no good?  There was a sea turtle under them they were watching.

 I found this sign interesting... 

Mom doesn't swim & she's afraid of the water.  (I'm not afraid, stalkers.  I can swim.  I choose not to like the water...there's a difference...)  Rhonda was helping mom get out into the water to see all the creepy pretty stuff under the water.

While they were all frolicking in the salt water...

My job was to guard our stuff.  It's a tough job, but somebodies gotta do it...

 The crew decided to go rent some snorkeling equipment & I decided to sit at the beach so we didn't have to pick all our stuff up.  The turtle they had been watching missed them...

 

 I have never seen coconuts in a tree.  

 Mom was ready (& excited) to start snorkeling.  Notice Butterfly...

 Once again, Rhonda helped mom.  Butterfly & B-rad were waaaaay to busy to stop for her.  They got pretty far out...

 and it's all fun & games until someone starts bleeding...  Mom sliced her foot open in several places.  Blood was pouring out.  The cuts weren't deep but there were a lot of 'em.  Rhonda stepped on a sea eurchin & got their pointy things stuck in her foot.  Needless to say - beach time was over.  (Yay.)  And little ole me who sat & watched our stuff didn't get hurt at all...

 Later that day we found a different beach.  (And all the snorkelers bought those rubbery shoes.)   

 This was more of a 'locals' beach.  I liked it better because it had real sand & it had character.

 UHM, anyone think of 'Grease' when they see that large rock on the right?  I swear it looked just like a scene from that movie!

 Once again, Rhonda helped mom try to snorkel...

I was still bored, so I decided to write my name in the sand.  What I did not think about was those silly boards (& my footprints) ruining my shot.  Sigh...

 The sun goes down fast.  They have about 12 hours of daylight & 12 hours of dark because they are so close to the equator.  Cool, huh?!

 Make no mistake, we visited each of these beaches again throughout our stay...on our last day we went back to that first beach & Butterfly thought he could climb this tree & get a coconut.  What a moron...